timsellers.net/blog
Part of me wants to break down barriers, set people free and make the world a better place. A bigger part of me wants to sit on the sofa, drink tea and play through old Nintendo games.
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Category : Humour
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19/11/08 : You couldn't make it up!
I think I'm too late to enter the image challenge but I thought I'd have a go at it anyway, so here is my Daily Mail front cover.
I think I've covered everything! I couldn't find the right font for the headline, but I don't think it's too bad for my first attempt at this sort of thing (I'm not exactly a Photoshop expert).
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15/09/08 : Jesus is his friend
This has been posted on a few blogs recently, but I couldn't resist the urge to add it here too. It made me nearly piss myself laughing. Actually, I was still laughing about it the next day.
I always thought that Christian rock was rather an oxymoron, but Christian, I don't know, Ska? It's just embarrassing (presuming it's genuine that is).
BTW, Jesus is NOT my friend. Especially if he's going to try to "touch me down inside".
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22/07/2008 : Steal EVERYTHING!
This made me smile, although Mr. Rock is actually making a valid point about illegally downloading songs.
Stealing music is hardly new. When I was a kid I used to "tape" - i.e. record onto analogue tape cassettes - stuff from the radio, other people's tapes, CDs if I was lucky, even computer games before disc drives became less expensive. My parents never stopped me or pointed out that it was illegal (and immoral) - in fact I'm sure they did it themselves. As did pretty much everyone else. Yet if I had have walked into my local branch of HMV, picked up the latest hit album and walked out of the shop without paying, it would have somehow been a completely different thing.
In my ideal world however everything would be free. People would only need to work for the minimum amount of time it takes to get everything running (no need to over work to make a profit, no middlemen, pointless competition or corruption) and could just help themselves to whatever they needed. They'd have plenty of free time to make whatever music or art or whatever they wanted, free from the restraints of having to following trends to keep selling their material. There'd be no theft, greed would die out along with most of the other problems in society. Somehow I can't see my utopia becoming a reality.
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17/06/2008 : Bush and Blair at the Gay Bar
This has obviously been around for a while; I found it by accident whilst searching for articles on the recent visit of the warmongering chimp boy to the UK.
There is probably a phrase in common use to describe bits of video stuck together over an unrelated song to be funny or make a point. Knowing of such a phrase would make this post rather less messy, but whatever the phrase is, this is a perfect example. I nearly pissed myself anyway.
The song is "Gay Bar" by the brilliantly bizarre Electric Six BTW.
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01/05/08 : Humph
I shall miss Humphrey Lyttelton, who died last Friday. Not for his skills as a jazz trumpeter, but because a well spoken slightly curmudgeonly old man can make a double-entendre sound so brilliantly filthy - and get away with it.
To be read aloud:
"Samantha is a croupier and often works at an exclusive Soho club where gamblers pay top money to play roulette all day and poker all night".
Samantha was the silent (i.e. non existent) scorer on I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue.
It sounds best from the man himself of course, so here are a couple of examples (the second one being the best).
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